My husband came home not wearing his wedding ring again…he just went to play "poker" .?

August 27, 2010 :: Posted by - admin :: Category - Q&A Forum

Question by Paralegal1982: My husband came home not wearing his wedding ring again…he just went to play “poker” .?
and came home not wearing it. He gave a half ass apology and then went straight to his xbox to avoid me :( He has done this shit before and I always felt silly for checking his ring out every night to make sure he had it on (on the sly). He said he didn’t know why he took it off. But that he does want to be married to me. I’m just done with the stupid avoidable shit that he does to hurt me. I just feel like he doesn’t want me anymore. Shouldnt I be really angry? he makes it seem like I have no reason to be upset. He even went as far as saying “what, would you rather me wear a ring to a bar and make out with someone”….wtf did that mean? He said he has never cheated on me. But how can I even trust him if he does this shit? What should I do…he has been pulling this shit for 3 years almost.
other than the wedding ring, there has been “hard” evidence that he has done more. Or at least tried. I’m not insecure, he just can’t be trusted! Screw off. I was asking for advice, not criticizm.

Best answer:

Answer by *born2Bmom*
oooh sureeeee…… just leave him. its obvious he is CHEATING!!!!

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15 Responses to “My husband came home not wearing his wedding ring again…he just went to play "poker" .?”

  1. Tammy * Says:

    There are other things you could be checking out other than his ring to see if he is cheating… but it appears to me that he is being secretive and untruthful. Remember people don’t change…

  2. GUEST WHO again Says:

    he is trying to pick up some girls which means he really isn’t happy with you sexually

  3. JShmo Says:

    Well i forget to put mine on sometimes… but I don’t act all defensive when i do, or make comments about making out w/ people in bars.

    If you are able to stay calm and have this conversation with him, you probably should. He’s not likely to answer your or want to if you are attacking him about it. If you really want to know the truth, sit down, calmly and ask him whats been going on. Does he just want to feel young again and have attention from ladies, or is he really going out and hooking up w/ people.. He does need to tell you this stuff, for the reasons of.. well cheating on you, and risking your health by sleeping with other people.

    Just tell him that you want to know the truth no matter what it is. before hand, you might want to decide how you want to proceed if he does say he’s been cheating. do you want to stick around and figure out why, or if you want to stay in the relationship, or if that’s a “this is it, get the Fu** out of the house” kind of thing.. “

  4. opetke Says:

    Failure to wear a piece of metal is hardly what I would consider HARD EVIDENCE.

    I think the only evidence here is that

    a) You don’t communicate well with your man
    b) Your man is actively trying to avoid you
    c) Your marriage needs a lot of work.

    Marital problems…certainly.

    Adultery…hardly.

    And by the way, men and women have been getting on each other’s last nerve for thousands of years. This is nothing that can’t be fixed.

    Good Luck!

  5. Millo Says:

    for a paralegal you dont seem to bright darlin’!
    3 years he’s been trying to hook another girl..that’s what is happening.
    silly thing is, had he left the ring on he probably have a better chance screwing around….i been married 6 years and i never take mine off, never even tried, doubt it would come off even if i wanted too.
    but i do get hit on by ladies nearly every time i go out with the guys.

    it comes down to this, can you live with this for the rest of your life?
    if not, u know what has to be done!

  6. Nicole Says:

    Wow, what a prick! Stop wearing your ring and see what his reaction is then.

  7. rickrude Says:

    Busted…ooops!!! He was probably at Hooters with friends just hanging out. The time to worry is when he comes home smelling like a women was all over him. Just remind him that you don’t aprove what he’s doing to you and make him sleep on the couch… Be strong Girl !!

  8. nickers999980 Says:

    My husbands friend used to go out often without his wife, he took his wedding ring off for the purpose of picking up woman, sounds like your husband is doing the same.

  9. Diva Says:

    Damn… You’re a harpy. Quit being so insecure and only start suspecting when he gives you a reason and not some stupid thing like taking his ring off.

    To men, the wedding ring is not as important to them as it to us.

  10. Ashley Says:

    don’t think your crazy for checking his ring finger. i occasionally check my husbands finger too. do he leave with the ring on? if so i would be suspicious. also the comment he made makes it seem like he is doing something he isn’t supposed to be doing. don’t accuse him of anything until you find out. and remember cheating will always come out sooner or later, you may not know now but eventually you will.

    good luck!

  11. Jemma Says:

    In other words, he’s been upsetting you and making you feel crappy and suspicious for 3 years now? My, aren’t you a glutton for punishment??!!! Leave him to his x-box and stupid stories about why he takes his ring off and get out there and find someone who makes you feel happy instead of crappy!! All the best,

  12. daughter_of_God Says:

    Stop listening to what he says (ie. he says he isn’t cheating, says he wants to stay married) and pay attention to what he is doing. He goes out to allegedly play poker but comes home not wearing his wedding ring. And when you want to discuss it, he hides behind his x-box or he becomes defensive and tries to make you the issue. And if he isn’t cheating on you now, he will be shortly. Get out while you can and before he gives you AIDS. I think it is time for you to talk to a divorce lawyer and see what is the best way to extricate yourself from this marriage. Take care.

  13. Painter Says:

    You are beautiful, obviously :) You don’t need to put up with his sh**. Unless you have been treating him really bad. If your effort is there and his is not, dump this a**hole and find a guy who deserves you :) Just a little advise from an old guy :/

  14. Pookie Says:

    Pick your battles wisely!
    My husband doenst wear his ring very often, primarily because he cant at work, and because after work theres not really a point in putting it on, I however do get excited when I see he does put it on (usually during the weekend when we go out- and sometimes not at all because he plays hockey).
    Maybe your husband just forgets to wear it and doesn’t see the ring as being the marriage, the more you nag at him the worst your arguments are going to get.

    Instead why dont you just be happy and make a point in telling him how happy you are when he is wearing it.

    If you think hes cheating on you, then you have a whole new set of problems besides him wearing the ring, but my bets that he said what he did to you out of anger, not because he is cheating but because your issue lies much deeper then him not wearing the ring, its about your insecurities.

    Dont ask a question if you arent prepared to hear what people have to say as answers, the issue isnt the wedding ring, the issue is your insecurities with him and the relationship, why are you highlitening what is so unimportant (wearing the ring or not for that matter) and not concentrating on getting yourselves some counselling to deal with the infedelity, do you just tell your husband to go screw off when your mad? (maybe he took that literally , appears he has)…either you need to get yourselves into some counseling to over come the fact hes been unfaithful, or you need to decide whether or not you want to continue being in a relationship with a man who treats you like garbage and cheats on you

  15. Wichita Says:

    Women are so weak and silly. Poker and poke her sound a lot alike.

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